Homebrew Rules

Monday, 18 July 2022

Full circle

Sometimes the best laid plans of mice and men go awry. Sometimes the cyclical currents of the cosmos carry you back to a place or a position you were always destined to occupy, whatever foolish ideas an individual might have held otherwise. Sometimes you’re just pissing against the wind.

We journeyed over to France last week, house hunting in Normandy, Brittany and Cote d’Amor, but unfortunately every property we fancied had a queue of Dutch folk outside…Dutch folk carrying Intermarché bags stuffed full of 50 euro notes. Mmmm. 

The situation quickly forced The Current Mrs Broom and I to reconsider our options. We wanted seaside. We didn’t wish to be as isolated and out in the sticks as last time. We wanted quasi Parisian ish sophistication, the chance to discuss Flaubert perhaps, with learned individuals at a special symposium. I wanted to wear cravats for gods sake. 

However, like I said. The unseen forces of the cosmos are forever at play, quietly nudging you onto the path you were apparently always destined to travel.

Our plan B turned out to be the « C » word. No not that one. C for Creuse, the department that is the butt of every sophisticated Frenchman’s humour. Bucolic, enormous and largely devoid of anyone other than these folks:

It is of course where we used to live, and as far from the sea and sophistication as it’s possible to get. It’s about the size of Wales but it’s population is probably no bigger than Droitwich. It’s a five hour drive, minimum, to any stretch of coastline. 

So to recap. Near the sea? Nope. Sophisticated? Erm…nope!

The few things it does have going for it though are well, lots of buildings like this:

I made a cheeky offer on the tower but they were having none of it. Bugger.

and this:

The current Mrs Broom makes a rare blog appearance.  She’s wondering how many curtains she’d have to make if we bought the tower in the background. I’m wondering how many years I’d have to spend as a male prostitute in order to pay for them. 

Bourganeuf. First town in France to have had a domestic electricity supply, and boy don’t they go on about it.

Bourganeuf central. Without our two massive heads blocking the view.

So we did the six hour drive down to the département and saw this, amongst many others:

In a town, so sort of sophisticated, massive, and emanating that especially french sense of faded and slightly tragic former glory. It was also dirt cheap.


You’d definitely need a goodly selection of cravats if you were going to live in it. 


Along with a masters degree in household electrics. The house was rewired in 1926. This was a clumsy recent attempt at grafting it onto a new supply. Oh yeah there was an asbestos and boiler problem too. The diagnostic report on the property ran to 14 pages.

From a Broom disaster narrative perspective this property had everything going for it. An expensive money pit in which I could regularly electrocute myself. Unfortunately I’m not getting any younger so despite the prospect of generating good stories for the blog, we eventually settled on this:

An architect designed barn conversion with an attached gîte. 

Our offer has been accepted and if all goes smoothly (it never does) we should be in it October ish. 

Sublime to the ridiculous. There’s seven bedrooms to choose from to turn into a games room. I shan’t miss  the box room I’ve been confined to for the last two and a half years that’s for sure!

So that’s the « what I did in my holidays » bit over and done with.

Gaming won’t really restart until we’ve moved and most of my toys will shortly be packed up ready for the removal chaps.

Post move I’ll be returning to my Strike campaign, plus working on some pre dreadnought naval action and these chaps:

Pendraken 10mm Elizabethan’s. Pike and shot - but not as you know it. 

I’m a bit torn at the mo between doing a Low Countries campaign with them or maybe an alt history Armada invasion one. The enforced lack of gaming will at least grant me a little time to make that decision I suppose.

Right then, I’d best sling my hook I suppose.

Toodlooh for now mes amis!











35 comments:

  1. Hello old chap,

    Many congratulations to you and the current Mrs Broom on Le Gaff Nouveau! I am relieved that you have found the place you found as the image of you as a cravat wearing male prostitute discussing Flaubert is one that cannot be unimagined….

    Email will be incoming just as soon as the laptop has cooled down sufficiently so that I do not need asbestos gloves to work (and before you ask my electrics are ok thank you very much!).

    Seriously mate, well done to you both,

    All the best,

    DC

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    1. Cheers DC. I’d like to say I’ve never done worse than being a cravat wearing prostitute in the past - but I can’t! I briefly worked for the inland revenue.

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  2. Looks a very nice house. You wouldn’t get that in Pembrokeshire (lived there for two years in the 1980s). I’d get some solar panels on it quickly.

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    1. Yeah solar panels are definitely on the agenda, yea gods it was hot and sunny out there. Be nice to see a bit of snow again in the winter too mind you. Here in the peoples republic of west wales we don’t seem to do winter, just a very long autumn. Our current Solar Panels are a total waste of time to be honest.

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  3. This man looks like the type of chap who would wear a cravat and have intellectual discussions.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Riffaterre

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    1. Yeah an interesting guy… Personally I think his early work on hypograms and sillepsys just about manages to stand the test of time, though his later exploration of intertextuality was massively overblown. Don’t get me started on that one! As a side note that cat had some cool cravats - which are currently on loan to the Bourganeuf Musée if you ever fancy dropping by.

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  4. You picked a good’ un there JBM. With 7 bedrooms you’ll be able to have simultaneous games running.
    I’d be a bit wary of handing over dosh to an estate with that name 😉
    Chris/Nundanket

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    1. Not as bad as the solicitors in Birmingham called Doolittle and Dally. Simultaneous games are probably a bit much for me but it’ll be nice to be able to leave stuff out in a space that is entirely my own thats for certain.

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  5. Now that is a rather nice property and one that doesn't look like a money pit or a DIY electric chair for the unwary home electrician! I'd go for rural and then just enjoy swimming in the lakes and rivers, assuming there might be some close by? Bon chance with the move and all that.

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    1. Hey Steve, yeah there are a number of lakes nearby. Might get the kayak out on one nex5 summer.

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  6. Now that is a rather nice property and one that doesn't look like a money pit or a DIY electric chair for the unwary home electrician! I'd go for rural and then just enjoy swimming in the lakes and rivers, assuming there might be some close by? Bon chance with the move and all that.

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  7. Gosh you get busy and miss a few blog posts and it all goes mad! Congratulations and good luck in Nouvelle Aquitaine ( It sounds like a dish or somewhere on the other side of the Atlantic ) don't forget your factor 50, I look forward to further adventures on the continent!
    Best Iain

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    1. Cheers Iain. I think you’ll like the Elizabethan stuff when I get it done.

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  8. Hmm seven bedrooms plus an attached Gite. You are turning into a bit of a property magnate. Are paying guests on the horizon? I'd seriously consider darkening your doorstep (and if you are lucky I'd probably go home too). BTW nothing wrong with working for the Inland Revenue I was at Scunthorpe District for almost 15 years but got time off for good behaviour.

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    1. Might do paying guests at some point, but that’s not the plan. I think it’s fair to say I’d welcome any of this blogs readership Dave including your good self - gratis. Cheap flight into Limogé aéroport and bobs your uncle. Bit of gaming, bit of sight seeing, bit of wine.

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  9. Excellent choice JBM! It looks great and with seven bedrooms plenty of room for wargaming. It doesn't look like you will need a lawn mower much, the grass looks a bit threadbare. :)

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    1. It does doesn’t it! There’s more driveway than grass out front, but an acre or so of it out the back. Enough, sadly, for a ride on mower. It’ll be nice not to be engaged in constant building work there (like last time) bough or moving boxes of ruddy mozzarella in a factory just to get out of the house.

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  10. Certainly looks like things are on the up for you now Mark, great stuff, house looks lovely and bright. You know we are all now planning our visits, see what you have gone and done! Sun, soldiers, good company and red wine sounds perfect :) Seriously though, hope it all goes smoothly for you both.
    Lee.

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    1. Thanks Lee, I know you understand where I’m coming from more than most. The sunshine and the wine yes, the good company, erm… Seriously though you and yours would be top of my guest list.

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  11. That’s brilliant news and it may not be quite on the beach but I think that property more than makes up for it. I suspect once you are settled there could be a flurry of visitors.

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    1. Hi Graham, it really was hard finding anything near the northern coastline. It’s hard to compete with the wealthy Dutch and Parisians who’ve pushed the prices up and are always on hand to snap up something new. With that said, the absence of day to day building work means the missus and I will probably be able to brave the lengthy journey to the sea anyway. Visitors - yeah it’d be nice to see a few of the folks who bother to drop by and comment on here. The internets weird, I feel like I know many of you, even though I obviously don’t! Lol.

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    2. Oh yes we could be serious weirdos! Be careful 🤣. Damn Parisians get everywhere at least a lot of French dislike them!

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    3. We are all serious weirdos…it goes with the territory. At least I’d be amongst my own kind!

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  12. That is a fantastic looking abode mate and six spare rooms (I assume you actually have to SLEEP in one if the bedrooms?!) is a superb bonus...you can probably have separate gaming, painting and storage rooms!

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    1. The current Mrs Broom has granted me the exclusive gaming rights to just one of the rooms. I’m not going to push it any further than that at the moment! Lol.

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  13. Now that's proper France! Looks great, hope it all goes well. Some 'interesting' properties on that agent's website... I think you should get a nameplate made up with David's suggestion - La ( or Le ? ) Gaff Nouveau' is genius.

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    1. Hi David…it’s La Maison so I’m guessing La Gaff would do. Quickest way to upset the post person mind you. They’re pretty touchy about their language, the French.

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  14. Congratulations on the new house and good luck with the move. Moving is always such a chore. I’m sure that you’ll bring along enough sophistication with you to make up for any lack in the new digs. 😀

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    1. Here he is…just like he promised! In celebration I’m going to try a peanut butter and « jelly » sandwich - well as soon as I can get some peanut butter anyhow. Does jelly mean jam? I suppose it does. EVERYBODY READING THIS NEEDS TO GO TO STEWS BLOG RGHT NOW - seriously, you’ll be glad you did, it’s great.

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    2. Jelly is not the same as jam.

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  15. What a lovely new house JBM…
    Almost at tale of There and Back Again…

    All the best. Aly.

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    1. Cheers Aly, I’m pretty chuffed to be going back to something nicer than we had before.

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  16. Splendid starting point for your Wargaming Palace!

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    1. Thanks Jonathan, it’ll be the first time I’ve ever had sufficient space of my own that I can devote entirely to gaming. I’m really looking forward to not having to rush my games in order to put everything away again at the end!

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    2. Having a dedicated Wargaming space opens up a whole new world of opportunity and discovery. Having space for a Wargaming room is a must when house hunting.

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